Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
he fucked my hip out of place.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
