Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
