Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
do nipples grow back?
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
