Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Randomize
