A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
