try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Randomize
