Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize