Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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