Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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