Texts From Last Night

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  (709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

  I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning

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  (709): I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning http://tfl.nu/z1rc
  Replies (9) Good night (2675) Bad night (482) Order T-Shirt
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  (631): View more from New York

  Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?

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  (631): Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's? http://tfl.nu/f1lf
  Replies (46) Good night (1196) Bad night (2519) Order T-Shirt
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  (310): View more from California

  YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!

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  (310): YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??! http://tfl.nu/ltdu
  Replies (55) Good night (8547) Bad night (638) Order T-Shirt
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse

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  (781): Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse http://tfl.nu/l7qs
  Replies (46) Good night (805) Bad night (7464) Order T-Shirt
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot

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  (217): you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot http://tfl.nu/time
  Replies (21) Good night (10755) Bad night (669) Order T-Shirt
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING

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  (404): just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING http://tfl.nu/vg2h
  Replies (18) Good night (5797) Bad night (991) Order T-Shirt
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..

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  (503): I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus.. http://tfl.nu/6jqk
  Replies (12) Good night (991) Bad night (3555) Order T-Shirt
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?

  (1-816): View more from Missouri

  Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.

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  (816): I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there? (1-816): Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket. http://tfl.nu/46j7
  Replies (9) Good night (3168) Bad night (850) Order T-Shirt
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  (432): View more from Texas

  There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!

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  (432): There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses! http://tfl.nu/cuv6
  Replies (9) Good night (2242) Bad night (827) Order T-Shirt
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  (709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

  You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.

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  (709): You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese. http://tfl.nu/dujc
  Replies (6) Good night (2644) Bad night (589) Order T-Shirt
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?

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  (304): I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this? http://tfl.nu/dpdb
  Replies (31) Good night (898) Bad night (1531) Order T-Shirt
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  (323): View more from California

  I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw

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  (323): I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw http://tfl.nu/ax52
  Replies (8) Good night (749) Bad night (1160)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.

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  (405): Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out. http://tfl.nu/dhlk
  Replies (9) Good night (1539) Bad night (273) Order T-Shirt
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea

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  (608): So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea http://tfl.nu/i0d0
  Replies (2) Good night (150) Bad night (587) Order T-Shirt
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  (562): View more from California

  New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.

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  (562): New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches. http://tfl.nu/v2w2
  Replies (9) Good night (662) Bad night (273) Order T-Shirt

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