first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
