i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
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