She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
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