What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Randomize
