oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Randomize