Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
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