do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
So much rum. So many feels.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
