Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
