I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
