if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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