Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
