sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize