New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
She has the best kind of daddy issues
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Randomize
