We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
