looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Randomize
