you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
