ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize