Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize