That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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