Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Well I just put wine in my tea
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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