All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Randomize
