i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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