you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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