This girl is more easily done than said...
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
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