I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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