I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
