You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
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