Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
