so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
why do cheetos always look like penises
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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