Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
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that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
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I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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