there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
