my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
