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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?

  (636): View more from Missouri

  our generation is not ready to get married

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...

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• (425): View more from Washington

  If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.

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  21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (850): View more from Florida

  your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.

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• (360): View more from Washington

  sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol

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• (323): View more from California

  I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward

  (213): View more from California

  There's a lil minaj in everyone

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• (818): View more from California

  My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.

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  19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”

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• (801): View more from Utah

  Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know

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• (281): View more from Texas

  I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...

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• (563): View more from Iowa

  I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.

  (720): View more from Colorado

  Good. The Jell-O shots look great.

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• (865): View more from Tennessee

  She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off

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