shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool