i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
