I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Boobs are out for the taking
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
