You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
