I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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