i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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