Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Randomize