ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Randomize
